I have no right to despair

There was a package waiting when I arrived home yesterday. I knew what it was, but I put off opening it, savoring the anticipation as I preparing dinner for my family, ate, cleaned the kitchen, swept all the floors (my dog is shedding so badly right now, I could fashion a new puppy daily from the hair he leaves behind), and got the kids ready for bed before sending them downstairs to watch their latest Netflix request: WALL-E.

At last, I was ready. Armed with scissors, I carefully cut open the box sent from my friend down in Atlanta. Upon hearing of my sewing machine woes, she volunteered to send me hers. I had no idea what kind it was, I was just thrilled to be able to piece again!

(Now, C, if you are reading this - thank you, you are a gem. Please do not think that I am ungrateful.)

Here's what was in the box.

A Singer Tiny Tailor. If any of you are familiar with this machine, it is a mending machine, not a sewing machine. Okaaaay, I thought, I can make this work until I can get something else. But no, I can't. There was no power cord in the box.

My high spirits plummetted. I despaired of ever piecing again! (It smacks of histrionics, I know, but I've been having a crappy week, and this latest setback was sending me over the brink.) So, here I am, the kids ensconced in front of a 90 minute video, the house as clean as I'm going to try to get it on a Wednesday evening after a long day of work, and me, slouched on the couch feeling sorry for myself.

Well, time to get my therapy another way - I pulled out my Bright Future quilt and started hand quilting. Then I remembered another special delivery I had received - a recording of an Alabama PBS special, "The Quiltmakers of Gee's Bend", has been making the rounds in my quilt guild, and someone had dropped it off to me on Tuesday. So, I popped it in and watched a video of my own while I sewed.

I already knew about their quilts. I've seen the books, I bought and used the stamps. But I didn't know the story. Oh, my goodness! Here I was despairing over not having a sewing machine for a few weeks, and these quilters had lived with as close to nothing as is possible for years! I was inspired, and I was ashamed. I have no right to despair. The truth is, I have so many quilt tops to quilt or tie, it is actually a blessing for me to not have access to a machine so I can focus on what needs doing rather than getting distracted by piecing another idea in my head.

One attitude adjustment, coming right up!

The Hutchinsons in DC

I was supposed to work this weekend, but got a last minute reprieve. As tired as I have been lately, one part of me wanted to lay around the house all weekend reading and quilting and eating. But Adam was taking the kids to Washington, DC to visit the wonderful (and FREE) museums of the Smithsonian and visit some of the monuments and memorials. There was no way I was going to miss spending that time with them, especially on Mother's Day. Luckily Adam did much of the driving so I got some quilting done in the car.

For those of you who have never been to DC, it is definitely worth the trip, but you must prioritize because there is too much to see in just a few days. Our primary targets were the Lincoln Memorial, the Museum of Natural History, and the Museum of American History.

At Natural History, the dinosaurs were our first stop, and we couldn't resist goofing off, trying to escape the jaws of the mighty T-Rex.

After hours and hours in the museum, we needed some natual light, so we headed outside, past the Washington Monument and the Reflecting Pool to the Lincoln Memorial - a very moving tribute to Lincoln. Along the way, my tree hugging kids tried to put their arms around the big trees lining the Reflecting Pool.


They also couldn't resist this neat tree formation at the base of the Washington Monument (the obelisk in the background).

My favorite was the Museum of American History on Day Two of our trip - as an anthropology major in college, the artifacts of our collective past really intrigue me. I could have spent all day there, but the family had other ideas. We wandered past the White House (or Barack Obama's house, as Donald calls it), and I was a bit depressed that today's climate necessitates keeping the public so far at bay. When I was in grade school, you could walk right up and take tours, but not so anymore.

The fun didn't stop when the weekend did. Donald lost his first tooth first thing this morning, so lots of celebration in the house this morning!


Finally, V at BumbleBeans organized a scrap swap for some of us, so this gallon bag of scraps is on its way to Janet in Canada this afternoon. Can't wait to play with the scraps you send me, Janet!


I hope all you mothers out there had a wonderful Mother's Day - I sure did!

A little bit of pride isn't a bad thing, is it?

My children make me proud every day; my husband, nearly as often. But it isn't often that I sit back and think proud thoughts about myself.

This week is different. On Monday, I sat down with my boss and negotiated reduced hours for myself for the coming year (starting in July). Along with those reduced hours, I also insisted upon a reduced salary. "WHAT!?!", you say (or at least my husband did). But here's my reasoning. I want/need reduced hours because of my children. Both will be in public school next year, where there is no after-school care. We live in a pretty remote location that makes it difficult to find a babysitter. My husband and I currently pick Jason (2nd grade) up from school every day and bring him back to work with us where he does his homework while we finish the work day. However, Donald will be starting kindergarten next year which is over at 2:45 PM, not daycare which is open until 5:30 PM, so we will have 2 kids with no place to go at the end of the day. This year's solution with Jason won't work next year; there is no way that Donald (AKA the Tazmanian Devil) can come spend the end of the day with me at my workplace without me getting fired.

I've been experiencing guilt ever since my children were born for having my children spend so much time with people other than me. Therefore, I see this dilemma as an opportunity - an opportunity to step in and spend more time with my kids. By cutting one and a half hours off the end of my work day, and reducing my lunch break to 30 minutes, I can be the one to put my kids on the bus in the morning, but also be there to greet them when they get off the bus in the afternoon. In my mind, I see us having snack and doing homework and then actually having a little bit of unhurried time prior to the dinner/bath/bed routine, something we don't currently enjoy.

Anyway, back to the reduced salary. That is something that I insisted upon because I know myself. If all we did was restructure my hours, I would feel compelled to squeeze in some work at home to make sure that I was still doing all the work of a full-time employee, even if all those hours weren't at the office, to justify still getting paid as one. But I don't just want to be with my children, I want to be present. I don't want to have to say, "I'm working; pretend Mommy isn't here right now." Instead, I want to say, with an indulgent sigh, "Sure, I'll play UNO with you one last time." or "Grab the frisbee and meet me outside!" (Yeah, I know I'm being idealistic, but I could say those things.) Taking a pay cut empowers me to draw boundaries, and say "no" when I am asked to or feel compelled to work beyond the hours for which I am being paid.

So anyway, I'm proud of myself. In my mind, and with close friends and family, I've been declaring for years how important my family is to me, how I want to be there more for my kids. Now, I feel like I have publicly taken a stance - my family is more important than my paycheck. And it feels GOOD! (And yes, I know that I am fortunate to be in a position to make this change and still have enough to afford a roof over our heads and food on the table - I know this isn't an option for every family, and even that not every family would want to make this choice.)

You know what? I'm proud of something else I did, too. At some point in the past few months, I accidentally left my nunchuks at the karate dojo. We haven't been using them lately, so I didn't realize it, but on Monday, they were given back to me. I've never left anything there before, and with good reason. If you leave any of your gear, you have to do 50 push-ups! So, on Monday, after a 45-minute karate class, I had about 5 minutes before I had to leave to pick up Donald from daycare, and I did 50 push-ups. I've never done that many before. In fact, I'm not sure I've done more than 10 or 15 at a time before. Jason cheered me on and did them along with me. The instructor stood by me and helped me count. And I DID it!! (Of course, everyone I passed for the next two days thought I was a snob because they'd wave and and all I could do was nod my head in return because my arms were too sore to raise them more than a few inches. I had to bend over in the shower to wash my hair because I couldn't reach my head otherwise.)

Luckily, you don't need to raise your arms to quilt. I've been working pretty steadily on hand quilting my Bright Future quilt. Thank goodness I have lots of hand quilting projects in the wings because I am still without a machine, and not being able to piece whenever the whim hits me is torture. Perhaps I could use the time I'm not spending piecing doing some housework.

Or not.

Quilt Weekend

My weekend began on Thursday afternoon when I placed an out-of-office auto reply on my email and changed my voicemail greeting to let people know I wouldn't be available until Monday. Aaahhh, freedom! But I was so tired, that I didn't really enjoy Thursday night, just got the kids into bed and hit the sack myself.

But Friday morning was another story altogether...

I didn't have the time or inclination to pull together fabrics and cut for the project that was featured at this year's quilt retreat, so I just grabbed some works in progress to work on - my Bright Futures Quilt that I am hand quilting, along with a snowball "I Spy" quilt and my Bonnie Hunter "Virginia Bound" quilt. Judi came through and lent me her machine to use - an Elna. Now, my machine is a $99 Singer from Wal-Mart. It is the only machine I have ever used. Once I figured out how to thread her machine and set the needle for a 1/4 inch seam, (over half an hour later), I started sewing. Oh, my! The difference was like the difference between my first car, an (at the time) 15-year-old two-tone tan Chevy Chevette, and my brand-new F150 Lariat SuperCrew pickup truck with heated leather seats, a tonneau cover, a moonroof, power everything and all the other bells and whistles. All of a sudden, I'm not so focused on fixing my own machine, and I am dreaming of getting a new one. It sewed like a dream! I didn't know what I was missing!

Anyway, day 1 of the retreat was fabulous. Our instructor was Barbara Cline, who specializes in Y-seams. I need to learn how to do Y-Seams, but this just isn't the time. Here's the class sample:

and here are some of the quilts the class was making:

She had samples and patterns for some of her other quilts there as well:

I loved this demin and flannel quilt, and hope to make something similar sometime this year.

In the meantime, here's what I was working on:

It was so nice to have all day to just quilt and hang out with friends. When I got home, after the delicious potluck dinner, always one of the highlights of the retreat, I felt so energized that I told the kids to round up some firewood - we were going to have a campfire! We stayed out late, roasting hot dogs and then marshmallows and trying to pick constellations out of the sky. My kids are so much fun - they are always up for anything.

Saturday was Day 2 of the retreat. We began with our monthly business meeting, which I missed because I brought the boys with me and we were running late. Another quilter has a daughter who is a few years older than Jason, and they all play very well together, so while they were with me all day, they didn't cut into my sewing time at all. I did get there in time for the slideshow and trunk show by Barbara Cline, though. I love that she didn't just show us her quilts, she also showed us her family. She's a neat lady. She has 6 sisters and one sister-in-law, and they all get together for 9 (yes, N-I-N-E!!) consecutive days each year for a sewing retreat. It gives me grand thoughts for my 2-day retreat with my sister every year... It was also cool to see the quilts that will be featured in her book that is coming out later this year, Star Strcuk Quilts. In short, they are AMAZING!

The woman who opened a quilt shop in the next town over last year set up a booth at the retreat.

I bought some Warm & Natural Batting for my Orphan Quilt, and I hope to put that together this week, maybe even in time for the drive-in next weekend. I also inherited some more juvenile scraps from a generous guild member, so I spent quite a bit of time on Saturday cutting, rather than sewing. The 6-inch blocks will go into my snowball "I Spy" quilt, and the other squares will go into their respective tins for use in a future project.

It is great to have a reputation as a scrap quilter - I am always getting surprise bags of fabric scraps.

The retreat wrapped up around 3 PM on Saturday. It was held at the Virginia Horse Center where they were also hosting a Spring Premiere Equestrian event. From our retreat room, we could look down on a Jumper competition in the coliseum, and I had been wanting to see more all weekend.

So, instead of going straight home, the kids and I loaded all my sewing stuff into the car, and walked around. It was fun, but I can tell that I'll be fending off frequent and fervent requests from the boys for a horse or pony for some time to come.

Last night, the boys and I went to the drive-in to see "How To Train Your Dragon" and "Sherlock Holmes." My brother came with his girlfriend and her two kids, and we had a great time, although my brother and I were the only two to stay awake through both movies.

Today, I slept in, and have spent most of the afternoon on the porch with Arlene Sachitano's "Quilt As You Go", a Harriet Truman mystery. It isn't my favorite series, but it will do. Oh, and how can I forget, while driving around this past week and weekend, I listened to all of Jennifer Chiaverini's "The Aloha Quilt." It was a good one, one with a current plot rather than one with lots of flashbacks to previous novels like some of her most recent books. I have already read those books; I don't want a new book to just relive what I've already read! If you like her Elm Creek Quilts books, then I recommend this one. And it has got me itching to try a quilt in the Hawaiin style, although that will have to wait until I get some others off my plate.

Between the retreat, the book, and the book on CD, I have immersed myself in quilting this weekend, and I must say, I feel better than I have, both physically and emotionally, than I have in months. Quilt therapy, there is nothing better!

Freehand Baptist Fan Quilting

While waiting for flights at the airport, I got a little bit of quilting done yesterday. The general idea is freehand Baptist Fans, but I decided to really just do one big fan in each corner extended out until they all meet in the middle.

Work is crazy, but good, so I can't write more now. Have a wonderful Wednesday!

Holding on until Friday

Remember this simple quilt top, my Bright Future baby quilt?

Yesterday morning before work, I sandwiched it and basted it and started quilting it with freehand baptist fans. I'm hoping to steal a few moments here and there to work on it, because this week is shaping up to be pretty intense at work. Which would be OK if last week hadn't been intense and I hadn't had to work all weekend this past weekend.

Friday is the carrot I am dangling in front of myself. That is day 1 of the annual quilt guild retreat, and I have had that day earmarked for vacation since the date was set months ago. Judi is letting me borrow her machine, and while I have no idea when I'll have a chance to prepare my fabrics for the workshop, I plan to be there. Only 3 more days. I can do anything for 3 days, right?

In the meantime, I am listening to The Aloha Quilt in the car, and really enjoying it. I find myself driving slower, hoping to prolong "storytime" as much as possible, and sitting in the car once I arrive at my destination, just until the end of this chapter. Sound familiar, anyone?

Thwarted!

I've been in need of some sewing therapy. Work has been over-the-top stressful, and you already know that my family life goes 300 miles per hour, so I was thrilled when I finally carved some time out for myself to sew on Thursday evening after the kids went to bed. I starting making these two little blocks, trying to use up the scraps I had of this cute dog fabric, planning to make some journal covers.

In between sewing those pieces together, I put a couple more of these snowball blocks together (I see a juvenile I spy type quilt forming),

and sewed some more of my ribbon quilt together.

Everything was going fine...until it wasn't. My machine froze up on me. I couldn't turn the handwheel, the presser foot just made the machine give a mechanical groan, nothing. So I took it apart, cleaned and oiled every moving piece I could find, rethreaded it, and still nothing. I wanted to cry! Not only did that stop my sewing for the evening, but my guild's quilt retreat is next weekend, and I will need a machine! Any ideas? It is just a $99 Singer from WalMart, so taking it to someone to fix would probably cost more than getting a new machine, but I can't really afford to get a new machine right now, either. Aaarrggghhh!

Let's look on the bright side...

1) I received these plaid flannels from Angela at Country Scrap Quilts in the mail - thanks Angela! I will put them to good use. I need to revisit my Flannel Buzzsaw quilt sometime soon.

2) I checked The Aloha Quilt byJennifer Chiaverini out of the library. All they had was a sound recording, but since it looks like I'll be doing some hand quilting until I figure out my machine woes, I have the perfect story to listen to while I quilt.

3) I have to go to work this morning, then rush to the airport to hop a plane to go to Atlanta to work for the rest of the weekend (no, that's NOT the bright side). However, I bought Arlene Sachitano's new book, Quilt As You Go over a month ago and haven't had a chance to read it yet. I'm thinking that this weekend's travel will provide the perfect opportunity to curl up with that book (actually, not even I am small enough to curl up in those miserable airplane seats, but I'll be curling up in my mind).

For everyone who has a quiet, relaxing weekend planned, please relax a few extra moments in my honor because I don't see any rest in my future until May 1.

(sigh) Calgon, take me away...